"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;"
Eph 5:25

Sunday, November 17, 2013

What Is Your Flag?

In the game "Capture the Flag," each team has to cross the border, steal their opponents' flag, and race back to their base without getting caught. 

But that isn't all there is to the game.  Other lesser scenarios play out during the course of battle.  Teammates are captured and either placed in jail or converted to the opposing team, prisoners are freed by their teammates, and flag runners are caught and flags are returned to their hiding places.

While there can be many small victories along the way, they all become worthless unless you are successful in capturing the flag and bringing it home.

Marriage can be like a long game of Capture the Flag.  As a christian husband you have a vision for your marriage.  You are responsible for bringing home the flag.  Maybe that flag represents the way you raise your children; maybe 50+ years of unwavering faithfulness.  For me it represents true intimacy (being known and accepted completely) with my wife.

Along the way you will have small victories and defeats.  Your children may become troubled youth.  Then again, they may grow closer to Jesus every day.  Your wife might promise to work with you toward intimacy, but not take actual steps toward the goal.  You might stay faithful for 25 years until a moment of weakness causes you to stumble into sin.

Whatever your goal, it is important to stay focused on it even when others (sometimes family members or even a spouse) work against you.  Just like Capture the Flag, your teammates might be converted to the opposing side to work against you, or they might be held in "jail" (not being able to break free).  Don't lose sight of the flag and don't stop trying to capture it and take it home for your team.


1. Pray for God's guidance.  Let Him know that you want to listen and obey Him.  Make sure your heart is in the right place.
2. Be honest with your wife.  Let her know what your goal is and how she can help.  Be honest and do not hide the details, even if they aren't well received.
3. With God's help, develop a strategy for your marriage to meet the goal.  Capture that flag and bring it all the way home.
4. Don't give up even when the most key team member abandons you and joins the other team.

So, husband, what is your flag?


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