"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;"
Eph 5:25

Thursday, January 2, 2014

My New Year's Resolution. (It's a doozy)

New Year's resolutions come in all shapes and sizes, large and small, individual and group, physical and spiritual. I resolve to lose 30 pounds.  I resolve to get out of debt.  I resolve to stay organized.  
Yeah, yeah, yeah ... I don't usually put much confidence in the New Year's resolution thing.

However, something my wife said a few weeks ago got me thinking.  We were about to have dinner, and it was our youngest child's turn to ask the Lord's blessing for the food.  (For quite a while we had been rotating around the table, giving each child a turn to pray.)   Using my wife's reaction as a gauge, I could tell she wasn’t happy with the quality of the prayers of our children.  She expressed a desire for our kids to learn how to pray more appropriately.  Then she said, “They don’t have an example.”


Even though her words were painful to hear, she was right.  My kids don’t have an example, and it doesn’t just affect their prayer life. Kindness, cooperation, sympathy, respect, compassion, and tolerance are just a few of the areas in which I have let this family slide. My children have a bit of a mean streak directed among themselves as well as toward others, and I’m here to say that whatever change is in my power to initiate, I am going to make that change.  Starting  here.  Starting now.

Currently every time I hear words “love,” "enjoy," or "smart," I hear three times as many words like “hate,” "can't stand it," and "stupid."  I hate this food.  I can't stand So-and-So.  That show/book/game is stupid. I wish I had a better/bigger (this/that) I hate snow.  I hate my brother/sister/room/hair.

My children tend to sit around instead of helping with housework, yard work, or general chores; they do so because I have given them an inadequate example to follow.  I have not gotten off my rear end to be an example, to help them.  I have not spent enough time showing them how to work. As a result, they don't work. 

When their prayers aren’t acceptable enough to be spoken aloud in a group, I need to step up and show them how to lead prayers out loud. I need to teach them how to pray in a way that is acceptable by doing it correctly myself.

When they display narrow-mindedness (I don’t like him because he has tattoos.  Her dress is inappropriate.  His hair is too long. They’re probably bad people because they attend (the wrong church/club/public school), I must get to the root of the problem inside myself and show a more accepting outlook in order to rid our family of such attitudes. 

When they are scornful toward each other, I must be an example of grace so they learn to be gracious.
After all, I am the head of my household.  If they fail it's because I have failed.

I need to be an example.  That is my New Year’s resolution.  

1 comment:

  1. What a great step for a husband and father to take - bless you in the leading of your family!!